Skin by Sixx:A.M.

I heard of of band Sixx:A.M. several years ago with their song "Life is Beautiful" and a couple others, but never downloaded all of their music. If I was on shuffle on my Ipod, I'd listen to their songs, but I was never crazy about them, mainly because I didn't really know their music that well. It wasn't until a friend reintroduced me to them that I fell in love with them, especially their song "Skin," a powerful, beautifully written song. It's truthful, brutal in it's honesty, and I feel like everyone should give it a chance. This is definitely one of their sadder songs - I don't really want to use the word sad though, maybe emotional is better. But they definitely have much more upbeat songs that are worth listening to (This Is Gonna Hurt and Lies of the Beautiful People to name a few). 

The last minute of Skin gives me chills every time I hear it, and I hope you guys like it. A very emotional and moving song, Skin by Sixx:A.M. is not one to miss, and it doesn't hurt to give the rest of their songs a listen :)

Kill them with your kindness

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4M5lZdwOicw

Impulse by Ellen Hopkins

Impulse by Ellen Hopkins

5 out of 5 Heartbreaking Stars

Act on your impulse,

Swallow the bottle,

Cut a little deeper,

Put the gun to your chest.

Wow, I don't even know where to start with this one. It's an emotional, intense, heartbreaking, depressing, scream-your-lungs-out-because-you-can't-handle-all-the-emotions type of book. Yet there are those small bits of courage, of hope, that make you think maybe things might, just might, be able to get better. Those are few and far between, as the three main characters of this novel face very real and difficult problems in their lives. This book is not a happy book. It does not pull back any punches. And it certainly is not a book to skim over the harsher parts of life. Conner, Tony and Vanessa have been dealt some of the worst hands life could give them, and it is after all three attempt suicide that they find themselves together at Aspen Springs, a mental facility. And it is at Aspen Springs that they try to overcome everything that has gone wrong in their lives.

Conner:

I’m afraid – a strange thing

to say, but true – that despite

whatever progress I’ve made,

when I get out of this place,

everything will be exactly

the same as before – even me.

I’ll still live in my parents’

shadow; I’ll still drive myself to

achieve impossible perfection.

And I’ll never let myself

believe that someone really loves me.

Conner lives his entire life striving to be the best at everything - academics, football, appearances - always to fall short of his parents expectations. Nothing is and ever will be good enough in their eyes; Conner will never be as perfect as his twin Cara, he can always achieve more, always do better. He is always a constant disappointment in their eyes. Obviously, the lack of love from his parents - love he has never experienced, even as a child - scars Conner in an internal way that is very hard to fix. It's this lack of love that drives Conner to be with Emily - his neighbor, and also his teacher. Emily doesn't want anyone to know about them being together, and eventually all the pressure from his parents, the fact that Emily is going to break things off between them, drives Conner over the edge. He tries to kill himself with a gun, and his failed attempt at suicide lands him in Aspen Springs. It is there that he meets Vanessa and Tony, and tries to change his life. 

Tony:

“Do you know how

              Many nights I lay in bed,

wondering what I’d

done to deserve your

silence? What had I said?

              What did I ever do, but love you?”

Tony's father abandoned him when he was just a child, leaving him with mother - a prostitute - who doesn't care about Tony at all. One night, one of her boyfriends rapes Tony, only 8 at the times, and his mother refuses to believe him. Tony's then put in Juvie for several years for 'attacking' one of his mother's boyfriends, and when he finally gets out, he ends up living on the streets, not wanting to be near his mother. Bumming change, selling his body to men, anything he has to in order to survive. Eventually, he swallows too many pills, but doesn't die, instead ending up in Aspen Springs. Tony is such an admirable character though; despite his horrible childhood, he still manages to make Conner and Vanessa smile, to make them feel better, even though he's still struggling. 

Vanessa:

And the thought of that

makes me want

to open a vein,

experience pain,

know I’m alive, despite

this living death.

Vanessa's father is a part of the army, never home expect for that rare occasion every several years, and this leaves Vanessa and her younger brother Bryan alone with their bipolar, schizophrenic, abusive mother. Vanessa also suffers from Bipolar Disorder, and one day she decides that everything - her mother, the beatings, the mood swings from manic white to deep blue, her life - is all just too much. So she lets her trusty blade do more than normal, cutting deeper and wider than she ever has before. Her brother and grandmother find her, bleeding out in the bathtub, and the paramedics, and her grandmother's nursing skills, keep her alive. After being sent to Aspen Springs, she is diagnosed with BPD, and is given proper medication to help curve the effects of her disease. Conner and Tony also help her. But it's ultimately up to her to fight her bipolar disorder, to continue getting the help she needs.


In Conclusion:

All three characters face real, terrible situations and lifestyles. They don't have dinner with the family, don't have people they feel the can trust, they feel that they don't have love, and they feel that life, for them, isn't worth living anyone. I'm going to be honest, this book is an emotional rollercoaster, and is one of the saddest novels I have ever read. Oh, Hopkins also writes in verse, but don't let that be a deciding factor in whether or not you read her novels - it would feel weird if they weren't written in verse. The poetic style adds even more uniqueness to Hopkin's novels, of course adding in the real-life situations her characters face. The one thing I don't understand is why Tony and Conner see Vanessa as this perfect angel who can make their lives so much better, but that's neither here nor there. Impulse is definitely not a book to be missed. It makes you think differently, view people in a different light. It makes you not want to judge, but instead to understand.

Imperfections create character.

If you've never read a novel by Ellen Hopkins, I strongly suggest you read Impulse. If you've ever been hesitant to read one of her books, I strongly suggest you read Impulse. If you've ever read one of her novels but not this one, I strongly suggest you read it. And even if you've read Impulse, I strongly suggest you pick it up and read it again. Because this masterpiece is not one to be missed or overlooked. 

Divergent by Veronica Roth

Today's Review is on.....

Divergent by Veronica Roth

5 out of 5 Stars!

"My will is mine...I shall not make it soft for you."

-Agamemnon, Aeschylus

This quote sums up this book pretty well. In the world of Divergent, society is split into five factions: Abnegation, Amity, Candor, Erudite and Dauntless. The main character, Beatrice Prior, lives in the faction of Abnegation with her family, where she was raised as one of the Selfless. However, when you reach the age of 16, you have the choice to leave the faction you were born into and choose another. This is when Beatrice ends up leaving her faction of Abnegation for Dauntless (the Brave), changing her name to Tris. There she must face three stages of training in order to be accepted and made into a member, risking becoming Factionless in the process (which is the basically being homeless, living on the outskirts of the city with no hope of ever belonging again). Belonging to a faction is the most important thing in the world this novel is set it, and you're pretty much screwed if you don't belong to a faction.

"Faction before blood."

This is like a sacred law that people live by in the world of Divergent, and if you decide to join another faction during the Choosing Ceremony, one different from your family, you are expected to forget them, and accept your new Faction as your family. I do not agree with this; asking someone to forget who raised him/her, with whom he/she has lived with for 16 years, is basically asking for rebellions of some sort. But it seems to be working for this world, for now at least. Although I don't really understand how these factions came to be. Yeah, to stop war and fighting and whathaveyou, but isn't dividing a nation like this just asking for war? 

"I don't care about the factions." she shakes her head. "Look where they got us. Human beings as a whole cannot be good for long before the bad creeps back in and poisons us again." 

Well said, Ms. Prior, very well said. At least someone in this dystopia realizes how messed up the world has become.

Onto the main characters:

Tris:

I freaking love this character. She's strong, independent, smart, and even though she is from the Abnegation, she took a risk and chose the Dauntless. My favorite line from her:

"Did I shoot him in the leg? No. He walks."

Tris will not take crap from anyone, and this quote shows how she has grown throughout the book. Even though she hates it, she does "pretend some vulnerability" in order to survive. I know other people have said it's cliche that she goes from no training to all-star, but that's because she's Divergent. Tris has an advantage over the other initiates, and she knows how to use this advantage to its fullest.

Four:

Reading Free Four has helped me understand this character more. Four can be cruel, but he has his moments, and I will admit to grinning when he and Tris share these moments together. 

"Sometimes I forget that I can hurt you. That you are capable of being hurt."

Four has the perfect blend of strength and vulnerability, which you don't see much in heroes in recent YA novels. Or at least the ones I've been reading. Most of the time it's unbelievably hot guy that's arrogant and sometimes jerky, but will eventually show redeeming qualities and then everyone loves him. I admit, I am not immune (Daemon Black from the Lux series by JLA. Ohhhh, Daemon....) But it starts to get old -and annoying- real quick. Anyway, as I said earlier, Four is cruel during some scenes, but it really is just to help Tris in the eyes of Dauntless leaders and other initiates. And he always makes sure she's okay afterwards. And he's freaking smart and awesome with computers.

"I think we've made a mistake," he says softly. "We've all started to put down the virtues of the other factions in the process of bolstering our own."

Side Characters:

Not only are our heroine and hero awesome, but the side characters are pretty cool, too. I really liked Christina and Will, and how they helped Tris. Tris's mother is badass, and so are her father and brother (Caleb) when push comes to shove. Eric is a dangerous enemy, mixing Erudite intelligence with the newer-Dauntless cruelty, and so is Jeanine, with her genius qualities and abilities to solve any problem she is faced with, regardless of the consequences. Oh, and I hate Peter, but doesn't everyone?

The Ending:

I wasn't sure where this book would go, in the end, for the climax. But I was not disappointed. I don't want to give anything away, but let's just say there is a ton of action, heartache, and holy-shit-what-just-happened moments. It was epic and amazing. This book was pretty long though; this is only the first in a trilogy, but I feel like I just read two books worth of information. Not that I'm complaining. I am very curious to see where this series will go. I'm not reading any information about Insurgent or Allegiant because I don't want to spoil anything for myself. I will admit to being nervous, though, because it seems like not many people liked the third and final book in the Divergent series. But I'm finishing this series with a clear mind and no expectations. 

If you like dystopian novels with action, romance, and just all-around awesomeness, then read this book! You will not be disappointed, and will get hooked on the amazing world of Divergent just like I did :)

The Fault in Our Stars by John Greene

SPOILERS BELOW

The Fault in Our Stars by John Greene

4 out of 5 Wonderful Stars

I feel like I expected more than this book offers because of all the hype; nevertheless, I did enjoy The Fault In Our Stars and am very happy I read it. 


Pros:

Hazel and Augustus make such a great couple, and I love their "okays" and how even when times get tough, they're still there for each other. They face real problems in horrible situations, and Green portrays this truthfully. 

"This was the truth, a pitiful boy who desperately wanted not to be pitiful, screaming and crying."

"I hate myself I hate myself I disgust myself I hate it I hate it just let me fucking die."

'Last time I imagined myself as the kid. This time, the skeleton."

Yeah, these are a few of the really heart-breakingly truthful scenes I mentioned. 

But then John Green goes and balances it out a bit with quotes like these:

"I'm in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have, and I'm in love with you."

So poetic ~

Aaaaand then back to the harsh truth:


"Grief does not change you, it reveals you."


but then...


"You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have some say in who hurts you."

This book really is an emotional ride, and it's brutal in it's honesty, but I really wouldn't want it to be any other way.

Cons:
 
Okay, I have to admit, there are parts that happen a too little quickly for my liking. Say, Augustus telling Hazel he loves her by page 153. I feel like that's a bit premature, but Gus does say he's "not in the habit of denying himself the simple pleasures in life" so okay. I mean, I did read this book in two days, so that's why it might have felt a little short/rushed to me, but it is only 313 pages. Maybe adding more would have ruined the novel a bit, but who knows?

The book is moving along wonderfully, until Gus's cancer comes back with a vengeance. I kind of expected it, with the way he was acting, but I wish we had more time with him semi-healthy. The last third of the book is him sick, and then BAM, "Augustus Waters died eight days after his pre-funeral." Well, okay then.... I guess we don't get to know his last words, or the last time he sees Hazel. This sentence is the only part in this novel that really caused me to feel something physical. There are other parts that I smiled at a bit, and felt sad over, but this sentence literally caused my heart to pang, but mostly at the shock of how sudden it was. I guess with all the hype I expected to feel that "pang" a bit more often. Also, I'm not a big crier, but I fully expected to break down while reading this novel. I didn't. Not sure what that says about me, but again, I think all the hype has led me to expect more than this novel offers. 

John Green pulled a total Van Houten at the end of this novel. Okay, Augustus dies, but WHAT ABOUT HAZEL? Does she find love again, when does she die? And Isaac; does he ever confront Monica? Does he find love with someone else? I get that Gus died, but I need to know what happens with the other characters! I guess Hazel and I have that in common.

Also, while reading I found the way Augustus and Hazel spoke (very maturely) endearing, but after reflecting on it, well, I feel that this hindered me being able to connect with the characters. I'm sorry, but people don't really talk like that. I get that they're intelligent and all, but... I don't know... It just made it hard to think of them as really real and without that, I feel like the connection to the characters is either fake or kind of forced, if that makes any sense.

Final Thoughts: 

I expected this book to change my life, alter my way of thinking about the universe and all, etc.,etc., but it didn't. It doesn't. I'm not really taking any life-lessons from this book that will affect me forever. I've read books like that, and still think about and thank them for what they've taught me, and sadly The Fault In Our Stars is not one of those books. However, it is still a great novel that is truthful and honest in all the ways that matter, and is definitely worth reading. John Green is on my radar now :)

2Cellos

Time for some music!

Luka Sulic and Stjepan Hauser are two amazing cellist that make up the group called 2Cellos, and while they may be cellists, they are not your ordinary cellists. They are two amazing musicians that have created some awesome music together and have no doubt inspired tons of people with their playing. Ironically enough, the two musicians used to be competitors, but there has to be thousands upon thousands of fans that are incredibly happy that they decided to play together (myself included).

I have to give my dad credit, though; had he not shown me this video, who knows when or even if I would have heard of the incredible duo? He started the video asking me if I could play my viola like they play the cello, and at first I was like "Of course I can, Dad, this is easy stuff." Yeah, that lasted for about one minute. The rest of the video had me in awe of their musical skills and made me want to say screw classical music, I want to play like that! I still feel that way every time I watch one of their videos or listen to one of their songs on my iPod. 2Cellos is definitely not a group to be missed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uT3SBzmDxGk

      

White Cat (Curse Workers Series) by Holly Black

I've written a couple of reviews on my Goodreads account (also under my name - Margaret Girardi), but I figure it's a good idea to move them over here, help keep myself organized :)

There's some good reviews, some what-the-hell-why-am-I-rambling-and-not-making-sense reviews, some short ones, some incomplete ones, some weird ones that are all over the place and it's now my goal to update my reviews and post them here. It'll be tough to update some of my reviews, especially if I've read the novel quite a bit of time ago, but I'm going to try my best! So here goes nothing :)

To start my novel review updates, I'm going to begin with a book that I absolutely love:

White Cat by Holly Black

5 out of 5 Amazing Stars!

"Magic," the girl says. "It’s just all magic.”

Wow, I can't believe it took me so long to pick up this book! White Cat by Holly Black is absolutely amazing. Black has created a new world that is very similar to the one we all know, but added one factor that changed everything - she created Curse Workers. And the best part about creating these new powers is that Holly Black doesn't overwhelm the reader with information. Curse Workers are very similar to humans, but have a power that humans do not. There are memory, physical, emotional, dream, luck, death and transformation workers (I find it cool that there's 7 types of Curse Workers, like the 7 deadly sins). Black also adds bits of history that enables the reader to understand how the world is the way it is. The story/plot-line is faced paced, grabbing your attention and not letting go until the end of the novel. It is intriguing, and most importantly it is realistic and believable; it made sense! There are so many novels that don't make sense or aren't relatable or believable because the authors decides that something is going to happen within the novel "just because they say so." That is definitely not the case with White Cat.

Onto the Characters...

Cassel:

"The easiest lies to tell are the ones we want to be true." 

Poor Cassel is the outsider in his own family. His mother, his brothers, his grandfather, everyone in his family but him is a curse worker. He used to pretend to be "the most talented practitioner of the very rarest curses" until he grew up and realized that he would always, in some way, be segregated from the rest of his family. But he doesn't give up, and he certainly isn't useless. Cassel knows to "lie until even you believe it - that't the real secret of lying. The way to have absolutely no tells." He's smart and conniving, but also realizes that he makes mistakes. This humanizes his character, allows the reader to relate to him. Eventually, though, Cassel's life changes in a way he could have never imagined, and realizes that "he was such an insider that he never even knew it - he was inside of the insiders." Cassel realizes that people are losing their memories, and the conflict of the novel is set up, allowing our hero to investigate. Twists and turns will keep the reader guessing.

Philip and Barron: 

I don't want to spoil anything from the novel, but I have to say that these are some of the worst brothers! You'll have to read for yourself to find out how bad, but this quote gives a good idea:"it's like I'm watching us all in a fun house glass, a parody of a family gathering. Look at us celebrating our criminal enterprises. Look at us laugh. Look at us lie."

Sam and Daneca: 

Cassel goes from putting up a fake front at school, from believing that "all friendships are negotiations of power" to thinking that "maybe the point of real friendships isn't that you have to repay kindness, but whatever." Quite a change, which is due to his forming friendship with Sam and Daneca. They both surprise Cassel when they help him, and eventually become some of his closest friends, which he proves by trusting them with some important plans toward the end of the novel. They're great characters that help bring out the best in our hero and are a wonderful addition to the novel.

Lila: 

Lila is a very interesting character, and has a strong female role in White Cat. It's terrible what happens to her, but she and Cassel make a great team. I really like her character, and wish what happens at the end of the novel doesn't happen, but maybe everything will work itself out (hopefully).

Final Thoughts:

White Cat by Holly Black is an amazing novel that everyone should take a chance on. It is a bit predictable in the beginning, but once certain facts are revealed, it's almost like a guessing-game for what is going to happen next. The very last scene of the novel ends on a sombre/almost morbid note, but is truthful. The game will never end, the cons will not stop; it's almost brutal in it's honesty, but I wouldn't want it any other way. I can't wait to see how Cassel's life will now change, what the future holds in store for him, but I'm sure it will be one hell of a ride. Time to get my hands on Red Glove!

Impulse

To start my reviews on books, I'm going to start with what I'm currently reading: Impulse by Ellen Hopkins. This book was recommended to me by my sister, and she got me to read my first book by Hopkins, called Crank, which is such a powerful read and led me to my second novel by Hopkins (Impulse). I'm only about fifty pages in right now, but Hopkins has once again sucked me into her story on the first page. However, as it's a book that focuses on suicide, I feel like I should balance it out with another (happier) book. Not sure what I'm going to do, but we'll see how it goes. 

If you haven't read a book by Ellen Hopkins, I strongly suggest that you do so - she is an extremely talented author, and you definitely don't want to miss out!

Hello!!

Hey Internet world! Not sure if people are actually going to read this, but that's okay. I've always wanted to create a blog, just to review anything that interests me (mainly books, but movies, tv shows, and music too). This is just a nice way to organize my thoughts and share them with anyone who might be interested :) Here's hoping I actually make sense when I post stuff lol and that this new hobby becomes a constant in my life! :)

And to anyone who may ever read this, I hope my reviews on all different types of entertainment help you find great books to read, movies to watch, tv shows to binge on, and new music to listen to :)

Enjoy this adorable picture of a cute giraffe, cause I love animals and why not? ;)